Are You Verbally Abusive? Stop It Now

Are You Verbally Abusive? Stop It Now

It’s actually normal to shout at someone because of anger or frustration. Sometimes you do it to get the other person’s attention. But it’s a totally different thing if you’re doing it often. Worse, your words harm and hurt other people’s emotions. They instill fear and trauma. It’s a whole new ball game if you’re verbally abusive.

Any kind of abuse should never be tolerated, and if you are doing this, it’s high time you seek help immediately. This kind of abuse has torn thousands of families and destroyed a lot of relationships. It makes finding work and friends a lot harder. People lose their respect on you, and it leaves you with a besmirched reputation.

Here’s how you can start dealing with anger verbal abuse:

Admit it.

The fact you’re reading this means you’re aware there’s something wrong with you. That’s a positive thing, as it makes searching and getting help a lot easier and faster.

Nevertheless, you should not just acknowledge it to yourself. You must make an effort to confess it to the people whom you’ve hurt, such as your children and partner. You want them to know you’re taking full responsibility for your previous actions and you’re willing to make the necessary changes.

Ask for professional help.

What you need is an anger management treatment. You need a professional who has the knowledge, expertise, and experience to help you effectively deal with anger. The good news is a lot of organizations are now being put up to help people like you. There’s a possibility you can find one close to your area, and it may offer a free anger management counseling.

There are also some classes available online. However, it’s going to be such a huge help if you can see your facilitator face-to-face. Furthermore, you’ll be given an opportunity to interact with the others and learn from their mistakes and coping mechanisms.

Count up to 10.

If you find yourself in an argument or you feel you’re about to say something harsh, count up to 10. That will give you a pause enough to make you realize what you’re going to say may not be worth it. It also helps to control your temper. This technique may take some practice, but you’ll surely get used to it.

Learn to identify the triggers and do something about them.

Verbal abuse can be attributed to a lot of factors such as stress. It could be you have the tendency to be very angry right after work. Think about the causes and the best ways you can avoid them. Using the example, perhaps you can take a walk before you go home just to calm yourself down.

Use affirmations.

Also known as subliminal messages, affirmations, one of the common anger management strategies, are words that conjure positive thoughts and images. The more they are repeated, the more you accept them into your subconscious. They have the ability to alter your beliefs.

Every day you can speak of the following:

I have the will and power to be a better person.

I am not created a monster.

I love the people around me, and I cannot and will not harm them.

I speak only soothing words.

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